The Day I Punched Wendy in the Nose

I was bullied as a child. I was too soft. Too sensitive. Toughening kids up to prepare them for the “real world” was quite prevalent. Eventually, I became splintered. I developed quite the attitude to cover up the rawness of who I really was. I was in second grade. The man my mom was married to at the time was very strict and I wasn’t allowed to leave the yard. I’d stand outside, play in the grass, swing on the playset. I did have a bicycle, but I don’t remember riding it very much. Maybe when my mom was allowed to take me. I remember it being in the yard one day. Wendy was one of the kids in my neighborhood and in my class. Rumor had it she had failed twice and really belonged in fourth grade. I believed it because she was BIG. And she was mean. She would take the bike out of my yard, take off my training wheels, go ride it around the neighborhood and throw it back in my yard. I’d just stand there and stare at her. I honestly had no clue how to handle something like this in my space. It was beyond my level of understanding. Looking back, that would probably make the start of a great movie ūüėÄ The bathrooms were in the back of our class, not like they have them now, down the halls. When it was time for bathroom break, we’d line up in front of the doors, boys on one side, girls on the other and take turns. I sat in the back of the...

I’m Coming Out

Many people have asked me what religion I am now and wonder why I chose to separate from my fundamentalist Christian faith. Today‚Äôs Love Note‚Ķ I was five years old. I was standing in the backyard, gazing into the horizon. I felt such peace and oneness with everything. I felt so connected and grounded. I rubbed my legs together and BAM, got stung by a bee. I remember feeling so upset that I had gotten zapped out of my peaceful state. I don’t know that I ever returned to that state until many years later. I had a pretty interesting childhood, but I’ll just speak to the part about fitting in. Like Marianne Williamson says in her book A Return to Love, it was like everyone had the instruction manual to life and I was clueless. I absorbed what everyone else did or said to define how I was supposed to show up. That may sound silly now but¬†remember, I was a still a child.¬†I was always sensitive and reserved . I probably turned into a rebel in high school because it was just too damned hard being an emotional softy. I couldn’t function with myself, so I turned into badass. I didn’t care about much of anything except having fun and doing whatever I wanted. I knew I wasn’t living the truth of my existence, but I didn’t even know where to start. After¬†my mom moved away with my little brother, I fell into a hole. My only support system convinced me to leave my car and all my possessions and pick up their one way ticket to...

For Coaches (and anyone who serves clients)

Yesterday, I received an email from someone in the coaching industry who proposed to answer a community question about the dilemma of having¬†a need to “over deliver” to their¬†clients. The questioner went on to say that they felt controlled, giving into various demands in an attempt to not disappoint their clients. In the age of a multitude of easily accessible information, it can feel overwhelming to keep up with what we might perceive to be client demands. As professionals in our industry, we take on the extraordinary task of consuming large amounts of information in an effort to keep up, stay sharp and bring the latest modes of support to the people we serve. In our quest for knowledge, we can create an internal pressure to keep delivering new information and services. I know I’ve found myself there. I still struggle to maintain the balance of keeping my work within a core structure and updating my offerings¬†in a way that might serve humanity best. While the answer might lay within any advice given, such as a childhood need for validation and acceptance from others, it might mean something else entirely. Today’s Love Note… We do our work because we love it, our work is an extension of our love. To feel not accepted by our clients might mean that there is more going on than not ‚Äúloving ourselves enough‚ÄĚ. It may mean that we are not sure that what we value is being valued by our clients. If there is a feeling that we are not doing enough, it could be because we are not sure we are delivering...

Bone Broth (and What I Did With It)

I’ve been craving¬†PhŠĽü lately, so much so that when asked “If you could only eat one food for 30 days, what would it be?” I chose¬†PhŠĽü.¬†I love the simplicity of the heady broth with clear rice noodles, a topping of meat and the array of fresh garnishes, like basil, cilantro, jalapeno, bean sprouts and lime. As I saw more recipes sprout up about “quick”¬†PhŠĽü recipes, I looked into what actually sets it apart from other broths and soups. I knew it was in the broth. When I attended culinary school for a short season, one of the things we would do was roast meat bones in the oven during class, then put them in a large stockpot with water on the stove and simmer them overnight on low heat. The rich broth that resulted was what we used throughout our class in recipes the next day. I’ve also noticed a trend in “bone broth”, a soup preported to have great health benefits. You can do a simple search¬†to read more about bone broth or check out this article on Bone Broth for Health Building from the Jade Institute. Fresh basil and bean sprouts are in short supply where I am right now, but I did have some vegetables on hand that ¬†I needed to use. I decided to make a beefy vegetable bone broth stew. As you may know, I’m not big on recipes. I’ll share a general guideline of what I did, then you can¬†recreate it however you’d like in your own kitchen. I believe that by really getting to know your food and working with it, you...

Blogging for Big Love – Part I

New websites with fun, quirky and shareable content are showing up every day. Their articles, videos and slideshows are filling our Facebook newsfeeds and our friends are sharing their pages. So, how are these sites getting so much attention? What’s with all of the clutter, ads and pop-up windows you experience when you visit these sites? Once you understand what some of these sites are doing with other people’s content, you’ll begin to see through the “click bait” and perhaps become inspired to start your own website, only using their tactics for the greater good. Today’s Love Note… I began to notice a¬†trend with¬†popular websites such as BuzzFeed and within a relatively new site¬†called First To Know. Some of the same layouts and ads were appearing in multiple sites that I visited throughout the day, sites that mostly from links in my Facebook feed. I did catch myself clicking some of these ads that appeared to be articles. Buzzwords such a “horrifying”, “mistakes”, “insane”, and “bizarre” filled the headlines. Teasers such as “WATCH”, “Dear Women”, and “BREAKING” just beg for you to go look at the next “frightening” thing. Today, I found myself on a¬†First to Know article about an abandoned French Chateau. There were a few paragraphs, a slideshow and a rather grainy picture of the owners. I decided to dig deeper. I searched for “Chateau de Gudanes” in Google and found their website here. As I clicked through the pages of the actual¬†Chateau de Gudanes website, I fell in love with their project. I even discovered this 15-day¬†decorative art workshop¬†that¬†features excursions, field trips, guided tours, and culinary...